The Culture of St. Timothy's (or An Ode to our Chapel Service)

I recently had the opportunity to speak to a group of prospective parents about why we chose St. Timothy’s for our kids, and what came out ended up being an ode to our chapel service. I love picking up little bits of what my kids learn at this school: understanding Latin declensions with James, admiring cuneiform with Everley, hearing about the nature table from Silas. But what pulled me to St. Timothy’s more than anything wasn’t exactly these classical elements; it was the sense of community, the shared values, and the dedication of the parents and staff - in short, the culture of St. Timothy's. I think our daily chapel services beautifully embody this culture.

Because of my schedule as a nurse, I often have the privilege to sit with a handful of parents in the pews and start my day with chapel. Frequently my youngest, reluctant to say goodbye in the morning and join the kindergarten class, will plead, “Are you going to stay for chapel?” On the occasion my husband is the one bringing the kids to school, he always tries to shift his start time a little later so that he can stay for this little service as well.

I remember my very first visit. I sat and watched the students file in silently, and I had one burning question: "How on earth do they get these kids to sit so quietly?' I may have even wondered if there was some kind of dreadful penalty they were all terrified of that made them behave so well. Of course there is no such penalty, what there is is a careful intentionality.

When the kids quietly file in and sit down, the younger students observe the older ones. They see them modelling stillness, and they naturally learn to do the same. It’s a beautiful cycle of leadership. This leadership permeates the school culture, from morning chapel to “kiddy duty” to house competitions. Our older students don’t just ignore the "little kids" - they look out for them. When they do “kiddy duty” at lunch, they aren't just watching the clock; they are actively playing with and engaging the younger ones. Our younger students in turn look up to the older kids and follow their example. 

This is not to say that there is never a misdeed in chapel. Sometimes, the kids need a reminder of how to behave. But when those reminders come from the teachers, they are supplied both diligently and gently. Our teachers have made it their mission to instruct our children in virtue: they encourage diligence, kindness, patience, and charity in our children. They take the Golden Rule and help our kids apply it to each interaction they have with their peers. And in a morning chapel service, there are quiet reminders of how to treat others well and worship with love and reverence.

The peaceful simplicity of our little chapel service represents the "magic" of St. Timothy’s. In a world that is loud, fast, and digital, our kids are learning to appreciate stillness. They are learning the beauty of an old hymn and the rhythm of ancient verse. It is amazing to me how just exposing them to these things gives them an opportunity to truly enjoy them. My 5 year old (who is a boisterous, sports-loving little boy) frequently asks at home if he can “do a poem” then recites “The Gift” by Christina Rossetti, just to share the sheer joy of beautiful poetry with us. And I often hear the tunes of the morning chapel service hummed quietly at home at the end of the day.

During my kids’ brief stint at public school, I often felt like I was on the outside looking in. I was trying to squint through closed doors to figure out what they were actually learning or who was influencing them. Here, the doors are open. I don’t have to wonder. I can join them for chapel at the beginning of their day, and I can take part in so many other ways as well: I can be part of athletic days, field trips, and service projects and see firsthand the courage, perseverance, and care for others being inculcated in the students. At events like Artfest and the Midwinter Festival, we see our children doing things we didn’t know they were capable of: developing an appreciation for art, music, and literature that we did not know was possible in such young children.

What a privilege to join together in this culture. If you have the opportunity in the coming weeks, I hope you’ll join us at chapel to see it firsthand.

Anneke Lendore has three children, James, Everley, and Silas, who are in grades 5, 2, and kindergarten, respectively, at St. Timothy's. She is an ER nurse, and enjoys any opportunity she is afforded to sing, especially sacred choral music. She and her husband Joel are blessed to have been parents in the St. Timothy's community for the last 5 years.